Grief Is Part of the Work: How to Feel, Think, and Act with Integrity
In episode 11 of Shifting to Ethical Systems, Jules Harrison-Annear explores what ethical leadership looks like when leaders are carrying something that rarely gets named in the workplace: grief.
“When we pretend we’re not affected, when we perform invulnerability, we lose something essential — our humanity. And systems change work that doesn’t centre humanity isn’t ethical.”
Grief doesn’t belong in a professional context. That’s what we’re told.
Stay professional. Keep moving. Leave your emotions at the door.
But what if grief — acknowledged, processed, honoured — is actually the fuel for better action?
Not the frantic, desperate kind that burns people out.
The steady kind. Rooted in love for what we’re trying to protect.
And here are three reflections that stayed with us from this episode:
1) Grief is not a distraction from the work. It is part of the work.
The JERICA Ethical Practice Framework starts with ‘Feel’ for a reason. You can’t bypass your
humanity and still build humane systems. When we skip the ‘Feel’ step, we end up acting from
fear, urgency, or performance. Not from values.
2) Let grief reveal what you value.
Once you’ve sat with the loss and let yourself feel the anger, the sadness, the disappointment, you can ask a different question:
What does this grief tell me about what I care about most? That answer is your compass for action.
3) Ethical action comes through aligned feeling and thinking.
Feel, Think, Act — all three, in that order, working together. Not checking boxes or performing
productivity. Acting from integrity, from care, from a deep understanding of what really matters.
Episode breakdown:
00:45 Grief in Systems Change Leadership
Why this episode speaks to leaders carrying the emotional weight of climate change, broken systems, and the loss of dreams.
01:40 The Tension Between Urgency and Grief
The pressure many leaders feel to act quickly while silently carrying grief about what has already been lost.
03:01 Why Ethical Practice Cannot Bypass Emotion
Why leaders cannot ignore their humanity and still build humane systems, and how the JERICA framework begins with feel, then think, then act.
05:31 Grief Is Not Weakness
Why acknowledging grief is not defeatist but an honest response to injustice, loss, and systemic failure.
06:25 What Grief Reveals About What Matters
How sitting with grief can clarify values and help leaders understand what they truly care about protecting.
07:47 Turning Feeling Into Purposeful Action
How aligned feeling and thinking create more grounded, strategic, and values-driven action.
09:10 From Performative Urgency to Values-Based Leadership
Why action rooted in care and love for what we protect sustains long-term systems change.
10:06 Leading Through the Feel-Think-Act Framework
How ethical leaders apply the framework in meetings, decisions, team culture, and their own personal leadership.
11:05 Vulnerability and Mentoring in Ethical Leadership
How naming grief and emotional reality allows leaders to think more clearly and act with greater integrity.
12:35 An Invitation to Lead as a Whole Human
Why ethical practice requires leaders to integrate feeling, thinking, and action to sustain themselves and the systems they serve
If this episode resonated with you, consider sharing it with a friend or colleague who might be carrying something right now.
Because grief doesn’t mean we’ve stopped caring. It means we care so much that loss hurts. And from that hurt, when we let ourselves feel it, we can find clarity and act with courage.